Monthly Archives: December 2011

100 Most Entertaining Survivors #94: Gary Hogeboom


Gary Hogeboom got 7th place in Survivor: Guatemala.

Gary Hogeboom was arguably the first famous person to ever play Survivor. This is because he was the quarterback of Dallas Cowboys for five years. (He also played for the Indianapolis Colts and the Phoenix Cardinals for a while.) Also, yes. He is so old that he played for the Cardinals when they were still the Phoenix Cardinals.

Some people would argue that being famous on Survivor would hurt someone. I mean, look at Jimmy Johnson.  But Gary Hogeboom wasn’t famous enough to be recognized by anyone but the biggest sports buff on the planet. Therefore, he hid his identity and called himself Gary Hawkins, a landscaper. Here begins the story of the ninety-fourth most entertaining Survivor in the history of the game.

For those of you who don’t remember, this is Gary Hogeboom. He received 7th place on Survivor: Guatemala.

Gary’s story would have been nothing of consequence if it hadn’t been for Danni Boatwright. If it hadn’t been for Danni Boatwright, Gary’s story would have ended on day one. He would have told us, the viewers, that he was actually Gary Hogeboom, and it would have been humorous, but no more funny than any single moment in Survivor history. But fortunately for us, Danni was there.

Danni Boatwright was a sportscaster in Kansas City. She immediately recognized Gary, but luckily for him, she was on the other team. Her team knew that Gary was a quarterback and Gary’s team thought he was a landscaper. It seemed like, for a while, this was how the game was going to go. But then there was the challenge that alerted Gary to the breach in his identity.

The challenge was a tug of war in the mud. The game was a complete deadlock, and Gary and Judd were fighting it out in a one-on-one battle. While Gary and Judd were fighting it out in the mud, Danni yelled the one thing that made Gary know that his plan wasn’t falling into place.

“C’mon! He is the quarterback, you are like the linebacker!”

All it took was that one sentence and Gary knew that his entire game was in jeopardy. From that point on, he had to mitigate the fact that he was actually famous quarterback, Gary Hogeboom.

When the tribes merged, he had to defend the fact that he was, in fact, Gary Hawkins.

Danni knew the truth, of course. But she eventually acquiesced. He ended up being voted out, not because of who he was, but because he was in the minority.

Gary didn’t only have one shining moment. He was also the first person to use one of Survivor’s most debated twists, the hidden immunity idol.

The story is set up like this: Judd has gotten a clue to the whereabouts of the hidden immunity idol. The clue said that the immunity idol was not on the ground. Judd decided to “help” all of his fellow players out and tell them “The clue is definitely by far on the ground.” The way in which he said this meant that almost assuredly he was lying.

Gary catches him, later that day, looking for an idol in the trees. It is incredibly funny as Judd does almost nothing to hide the fact that he is looking in the trees. Gary immediately has a confessional that makes Judd look like a complete idiot, and we all laugh.

There you have it. It isn’t the longest entry on this list. But Gary provided us with tons of entertainment that I will always remember.

And remember, he is NOT Gary Hogeboom. Yes he may look like him, yes he may be the same age, yes he may be Gary Hogeboom. But under NO CIRCUMSTANCES is this man actually Gary Hogeboom.

Thanks for reading, and please leave comments.

Jeff

Clue to #93: This guy had one of the most painful-sounding injuries in the history of the game.

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100 Most Entertaining Survivors #95: David Murphy


There has been a request that I begin each blog with the season and placement of each person on the top 100. Therefore:

David Murphy got 12th on Redemption Island, season 22 of Survivor.

The reason I have added David on a list of the 100 most entertaining Survivors is mainly because he was so far ahead of the game on his Zapatera tribe.

Klien Wilhelm is a fellow Survivor fan. He is one of the first people I met when I came back into the Survivor game after a hiatus of a few years (see entry on Ian Rosenberger for that story). I always respect his opinion and he has provided some great insight in many of the facebook Survivor groups that I am a part of. When I asked him about David Murphy, he said the following:

“He was kind of a douche. He was one of those people who couldn’t respect that he got duped, but yes his jury question was entertaining”

It isn’t exactly the most raving review of a Survivor. However, the douchiness is exactly what makes someone like David entertaining. Klien and I do disagree, however. Klien says that he couldn’t respect that he got duped. I feel like his jury speech shows that he definitely respected that fact. But ah well, differences of opinion always emerge in Survivor, and this is no different. With no more to introduce, I present you with David Murphy.

For those of you who don’t remember, this is David Murphy, a 31 year old defense attorney from West Hollywood.

In the pre-game interviews, we found out that David had one of the highest IQ’s of anyone on the show… ever. This immediately spoke to me, as I have always wondered if smarter people have an advantage in the game of Survivor. I felt as if David Murphy had the biggest chance of winning among the non-returning players in Redemption Island. He was physical enough to win some challenges, but wasn’t seen as a huge physical threat. He could do puzzles, a huge advantage in Survivor challenges. And he was smart beyond all belief, with an IQ higher than any person in Survivor history. He was my early pick to win until I found that Rob and Russell were going to be on the show.

One of the main reasons that I liked David Murphy was because I could feel his frustration coming through on the screen. I felt as if I would have played the game in a similar way, and when he was talking to Zapatera on the beach when deciding to get rid of either Sarita or Stephanie. I felt like he was ahead of the game when it came to the first half of the show. I would have listened to him if I were on his tribe. I would never take him to the end. He is a dangerous player, and if he were given a bunch of sheep for an alliance, he could have taken them to the end much like Rob did this season. Unfortunately, he got some strong willed people on his side who didn’t share his views on how to play the game. It is unfortunate, I would have loved to see him make it far into the game and do some damage.

Another reason why I liked David was the “crazy eyes” as I began to call them. Whenever anyone on Zapatera would say anything stupid, which happened quite often of course, David Murphy wasted no time in giving them a look that said in no uncertain terms, “You have got to be kidding me. I hope for the sake of our species that you do not breed because you just might be the stupidest person I have ever met”. At least that is how interpreted the look. Here are a few examples for your enjoyment.

This one adds an air of “I’m dreaming right now. No one can possibly be that stupid.”

This one is “I can’t believe I just heard that. But I don’t want to make a face to make it too obvious that I am imagining you burning in hell right now.”

This one is a rare shot that was caught right in the interim between “I’m happy because someone I hate is going home tonight” and “I might shoot you for thinking that getting rid of that person is a good idea.” This facial transition is quite rare, and it is a great picture.

This is David thinking “How am I going to get to the end of this game with these freaking idiots?” Unfortunately, he didn’t make this face enough.

David Murphy could have been a Survivor legend. He was truly one of the academically smartest people to ever play the game. I hope that he gets invited back to a future season of Survivor so everyone can see the awesome that is David Murphy.

Thanks again for reading, and I hope that you all comment and let me know what you think and add suggestions. I do read every suggestion, and implement most of them/clarify misunderstandings. Please let me know what you think!

Thanks

Jeff

PS: If you have read the previous entry, you know that I am trying my damndest to get Survivors to comment and quote about things for the top 100 list. David has agreed to give me a quote, but hasn’t come up with exactly what he wants to say. Once he tells me, I will add it here without hesitation.

PPS: If you noticed on this blog, I added a fan quote about David. I am going to begin doing this from now on. I will try to get one fan quote per entry from here to the top 50 or so. From there I will get more quotes per page. If you would like to comment on a specific Survivor and would that comment to be added here, let me know via facebook, e-mail, or any other means really. I look forward to this new addition.

PPPS: JeffsSurvivorBlog hit 2,500 views this week! I know that this doesn’t seem like much, but for a beginning Survivor blogger, it seems like quite an accomplishment. I thank you all for the support and hope you will continue reading, commenting, and enjoying.

Clue to #94: This person was the first to capitalize on one of Survivors most surprising twists on one of the most underrated seasons.